Lately I’ve been feeling very much out of control, like my life is running me, not that I’m running it. I’m very tired a lot of the time. Trying to cling to some sort of routine. There just seems to be too much to do, too many people to please. Something’s gotta give soon, or I’m going to keel over. My dreams this week have been wicked. So real. So intense. Makes for exhausting sleep. Every weekend this summer I’ve had plans. And heading into August, I still have plans. This never happens. I want a weekend to just stay home alone and watch movies. To turn off the phone, curl up in my jammies on the futon and drink wine and eat dark chocolate. I’m actually looking forward to fall and winter, to a slower pace, to a steadier routine. I feel like I’ve been running flat out since the middle of March. Oh well, I pound back another energy drink and get ready to go to the gym. I’m enjoying the gym. The gym seems to help.
This weekend is the annual Coughlan family reunion. There may not be as many people as in previous years. Rain in the forecast. A lot going on elsewhere including the Eagles concert in Moncton and racing in Chatham. But I’m going. I’m actually looking forward to it and don’t care if nobody goes. I’m hoping to relax. To just chill out. Of course it’s more likely that I will turn into party animal person, stay up too late, get up too early, eat too little, need two days to recover, but still I have the hope of rest and relaxation. I think I’ll make some jerk chicken nachos to take with me. They were a hit with some last year. Too spicy for others.
Listening To: thunder